I don’t even know how to begin this post. It’s been so long since I blogged that I almost forgot how to log into my site.
I’ve had several people ask me why I haven’t been blogging. I love and appreciate that anyone actually cares. The easy answer to that question… and please don’t tag me as being super spiritual… I just haven’t felt led here.
There are days when I have actually sit down to blog–to apologize for my absence and share something of worth here.
And then, so clearly and firmly, the Lord leads me in another direction.
Think I’m crazy if you want. It does sound a little crazy. Why would the Lord care if I’m blogging or not blogging? Well, I think He cares deeply about how we spend our time. And I was spending a lot of my time blogging while neglecting a project and purpose HE put in my heart.
I’m deep into my next novel, and still praying every single day that somehow, someway, God blesses the first one with publication. It’s easy to believe that the world has forgotten about me… that the publishing world is impossible to break into… that because it hasn’t happened yet, it won’t.
But the truth is… my life isn’t in the hands of a literary agent. Or a publishing house. If the creator of the universe chooses to do something with my writing, He’ll do something with my writing. The waiting is killer. And the struggle to be positive even more impossible. But if I believe that book isn’t about me, but rather the One who gave it to me, how then could I doubt its possibilities?
What I could use from you? Prayers! Please pray for God’s hand on my writing. That none of it is mine and all of it is His. That I wouldn’t lose heart or lose hope. That I’ll be patient and wait on Him. That I’ll have the fortitude to stand whatever criticisms and setbacks come my way. Because they will come.
So I’m not giving up on this blog. I’m just working on other things… bigger things… for now anyway.
If I’m being 100% honest, I always question myself whenever I think I hear from God. “Was that me? Or was that really God? Am I making this up? How can I know for sure?” I tell Him all the time things would be a whole lot easier if He would just speak with me like He spoke with Abraham or Noah. (But then again, that would probably totally freak me out.) But even if I just sorta THINK I’m hearing from Him, I want to be obedient. I’m not gonna risk it. I want to do His will. Not mine.
And so… I’m digging in to finish this novel.
If you’re interested in keeping up with my life and my family’s daily chaos, I tweet! A lot. You can follow me at twitter.com/ang_slaughter.
See you soon.